The Loss Behind Our Children’s Innocence

Every time I go present PROJECTbraincore at a school, I’m overwhelmed by the variety of kids I see. Kids that are over-stimulated, under-stimulated, pushed to their potential, pressured into anxiety, or completely ignored. It’s almost rare to see a well-balanced child. I’ll be gazing out at these precious individuals and can almost pinpoint the ones who’re going to end up in bad, drug fueled situations, and it’s heartbreaking.

We’re hurting, you guys, and not just us, but our kids too.  But where is this pain coming from? It’s coming from the pressures that society has instilled; great intentions can become detrimental. There’s this fight to become the biggest and best that we sometimes lose sight of the person behind the mask.Our children don’t have the luxury of having fun and doing the best they can in school, while actually having the faith that they’ll be successful. There’s this drive and dialogue of perfection, it’s overwhelming for you, but imagine how it translates to those little minds.

Many kids perceive themselves in a far more critical light than you’d believe. They may consider themselves a loser, whether it’s academically or socially, so, they search for something to heal the pain. You’ve all felt it, the pain that begins to well inside till you just have to escape—whether it’s booze, drugs, or just moving cities. This sadness isn’t segregated to the old anymore, our children…our babies, as young as twelve year’s old, have begun reaching for anything to numb the sadness. And no, they’re not sneaking extra packets of gushers or streaming the latest explicit Drake lyrics.

They’ve begun to turn to something darker and harder to break away from—drugs, prescribed pain relievers, booze. They’re easy to find. They’re in your medicine or liquor cabinet—it’s easy. But what’s easier than dealing with a misstep at home?Obtaining them at school. Before you start thinking, “Oh Gina, my baby boy would never do that. He knows what it can do to you, we’ve instilled better morals than that.” Guess what? That’s wrong. Super wrong. In their mind, maybe drugs serve as their escape, or it could possibly be an affirmation that they really aren’t as great as everyone thinks they are. That’s how it all begins.

In 2014, The National Institute on Drug Abuse found 21.5 million Americans, 12 and older, had a substance abuse problem with 1.9 million using prescription pain relievers…Still think it won’t happen to your family? I did too until a close family relative went down the wrong path followed by his younger sibling. It really can happen to anyone.

And today I’m sad, and I’m pulling out my “advocate card” by saying we have to help these kids. If you created a beautiful baby, your baby needs you. He or she is waiting for you to break in and ask them those questions they’ve been avoiding, but how do you even begin to do that?

Well, that’s where I come in. Picture your son or daughter sitting on the couch beside you. Yes, it’s difficult to broach heavy subjects so remember to breathe in through your nose and release through your mouth. Re-center and connect to your heart by imagining the first time you held that precious little soul; so innocent and vulnerable. Gather that heart energy and look at your beautiful bloodline and ask, “Honey, how’ve you been doing? Is everything okay? I feel your sadness; is there something that happened I should know about; how can I make you feel better?”

Please, don’t say another word. Wait for them to answer. Help pull the words out if they need it, but have patience. Yes, it’s uncomfortable, but it’s necessary. Wait for the tears, hug them tightly and pour your heart energy into them.

The time is now to connect with your children. Whether they’re eight year’s old or eighteen year’s old, it’s never to late to reach out and listen.

Remember, it’s important to listen to your soul, but it’s even more important to listen to your loves.