Yep. Me. I was 31 weeks pregnant with my first-born baby boy and experiencing some weird dizziness symptoms. My doctor suggested I go to the hospital to get monitored. After 8 long hours of test after test, my doctor called me. I could hear a slightly different tone in her voice, then the words “I have good news and bad news.” I don’t remember the good news at all, but the bad will stick forever….
“You have a 9cm mass on your pancreas,” she said.
“Wait, a tumor? Like I have cancer?” I asked.
“Yes, we are trying to figure out what to do, but you’ll be staying in the hospital for now,” she explained and we hung up.
My husband had a straight look on his face. I’m assuming I did too. I was shocked.
“Joel, I don’t understand, I don’t feel sick,” I said.
He was so lost on what to do, so he left to grab me some clothes at home.
I’ll never forget the feeling I had lying so vulnerable in that hospital bed. Would you believe it was THE day Patrick Swayze announced he had pancreatic cancer, the deadliest form. I heard him on the news in my hospital room. I didn’t want to die, I was starting a family, but more than that I really wanted to live. I had so much more I wanted to do in life. I could feel myself starting to panic inside.
Right away I needed to call someone because I was about to lose it. And who did I choose? Looking back, I realize it was the two people I knew who were closest to God. Both of them said they would pray for me. That felt like the right thing to do, exactly what I needed.
The next morning after a series of risky tests for my baby they decided to do a simple ultrasound. My husband was so overwhelmed, my worried mother decided to take over. As the ultrasound technician examined my pancreas, I knew something just wasn’t right.
“What did they say you had?” the ultrasound technician asked. A-ha! I could feel the energy starting to swing my direction.
“A tumor on my pancreas” I said.
“I’m not supposed to say anything, but I don’t see a thing,” said the technician.
I locked eyes with my mom. “Something’s wrong, I know it,” I confidently said.
As we returned to my room the cardiologist was waiting to assess me. He had me stand up and looked me in the eyes and said, “I’ve seen a lot of sick people and you don’t look sick to me.”
My hope jar was filling up. That wasn’t the story I wanted to write and right in that moment it flipped. My doctor walked in flipped her clipboard on the bed and said, “Go home.” I knew the worry was over.
“What happened?” I asked.
“The radiologist didn’t know you were pregnant,” she humbly stated.
That 9cm mass was my Juju’s head, he was breech positioned and using my pancreas as a pillow (the hospital never told me that part, I pieced it together years later).
I’m grateful for no diagnosis and for this lesson that empowered my health. Although, I will never forget the fear that consumed me so quickly when I busted into tears telling my friend I was going to die. And right then my sister angel connected me to faith and I immediately felt stronger than I ever had in my life. I learned that the power is within me.
I was paralyzed with fear. Now, I can see and feel the fear in my clients who come to see me. Studying Energy Medicine has allowed me to actually see the energetic pattern of cancer long before it will show up on any radiographic image. When we can tap into the emotional frequency of our physical bodies we can begin to see the crucial changes needed to empower our health.
I can help you surrender and release the paralyzing anxiety so you can move with faith through your illness. This life experience blew my heart open to empathize with anyone struggling with a diagnosis. I was blessed to only have a twenty-four-hour scare, but the panic shut me down. I quickly needed to lean on someone for hope and guidance. Find your team and know your people. Let them guide you to the light.
I’m also here to help,